There are many reasons why we do things. Our jobs, our exercises and even our meals. And within each, there are layers upon layers of reasons.
Perhaps the job was about the pay, but it might be to get closer to a growing industry.
Perhaps the meal was for the food, but it could be also an excuse for a gathering.
Perhaps exercise was for fitness, but it might actually be a semi-distracted environment for your child to reveal the truth about their day.
As we get stuck, getting caught in a cycle, it could be a good time to start a dialogue. Why do we do the things we do?
As we start getting to the core of it, we start to uncover these motivations. It could be about guilt, shame and fear. It could be about perks, status and jealousy. It could be about fun, learning and joy.
It worth noting here that any piece of wisdom that anyone gives, about what you need or what you want, it’s going to sound like nonsense to you. I think fundamentally we just have to find it for ourself, so the important part is not the answer, it’s the question.
We start by sitting down and asking ourselves questions. Unpacking the layer of reasons and find the motivations behind each one of them. Then, consciously piecing it back together and rearranging it with priorities.
And maybe then, when we can find enough, we are able to get unstuck and do the next thing, and the next thing. Slowly, we can shift from something we ‘have to’ do, to something we ‘get to’ do.
And like all important things, it starts with why.
(Thanks Chiara Cokieng for teasing out this article.)