When you are poor, people ask you for money. You say, “I need it to pay rent.”

When you are rich, people ask you for money. What excuse will you give?

Are you a bad person if you reject a $10 donation request? What if you got hundreds of these requests a month?

People get disappointed, angry, or enraged when you turn them down.

• Where to donate? How much?

• How to offer help? How much?

• How to choose the next project? What’s your scope?

These are boundaries and constraints you set.

Invisible to others are there to save yourself first.

So that you have fuel to save the world.

“I feel stuck about my job and I’m not sure I can do this anymore.” It could be that doing something new is scary. And when we shine a light on what’s scary. It’s disappear like the boogeyman. We can start plan for the few worst-case scenarios instead of being paralysed with fear.

“I dislike this person.” And get busy building a wall and manipulate everyone else around me to hate this person. Not knowing that, it is hindering a vulnerable conversation of the real issue.

“I really want this thing. I see everyone who hinders the goal as an enemy to defeat.” Could it be that people are minding their own business and you are banging into them because of your high velocity.

To know the layers of the repercussions from our actions. The layers of different intentions. We benefit ourselves (and the people around us) when we are aware.

Stuck figuring out what to do with your life? We can blame Passion.

Dave Evans correctly points out that “what’s your passion?” is a dangerous question. When we use a question to judge and organize our life, we empower its hidden beliefs.

(1) We all have a passion

(2) You’ll know it early in life

(3) Your passion won’t change

(4) It’ll make you money

(5) The world will let you do it

The alternative is to look for clues in your interest. Talk to people, prototype and learn.

Designing Your Life is a great place to start.

Netflix has no OKRs (Objective and Key Results). It has “freedom and responsibility”.

This is not entirely true. Reed Hasting later added processes for employee safety and sexual harassment, customer data privacy, and financial reporting. Stating its importance in “high-volume, low-error” or safety-critical environments.

Comparing it to Intel, where OKRs are the backbone of the management success, Netflix believes that OKRs stiffen creativity and create operation overhead.

When your product is creative, beware of the tradeoffs.

The same is true for startups who have yet to a product a people love and recommend.

“Who am I to question them? They’ve been in business as long as I’ve been alive.” Kat Cole thought.

“Who am I to set boundaries? He’s sacrificed so much for me.”

“Who am I to not help? When my parents have given me all that I have.”

Gratitude, morality and humility can be a way to manipulate. Yourself too.

Humility doesn’t mean servitude.

The newly appointed CEO can question the very seasoned executives.

You can be respectful AND set firm boundaries. To your friend, your partner and your parents.

It is pretty easy to escape offending a few people and avoid tiring yourself.

Finding the courage to face up to the short-term discomfort, create a way forward to a sustainable form of happiness. For the greater good, and you.