That irritating, pesky voice is not you.

To observe something, it requires distance. A vantage point.

An astronaut observes the earth only when she away from it.

Yes, you can see your eyes with a mirror. Don’t get tricked. That’s a reflection of the image of your eye. It’s not your eyes.

Recognising that those thoughts are not you. They are conditioned by your upbringing, society and experiences.

That’s the beginning of the journey of better thoughts.

In relationships, we work as a team for collective happiness.

A trap that we fall into is to withhold information because we don’t want to hurt the other person. Deep down, we do that to avoid the pain of confronting and making change.

When we start withholding, it leads to withdrawal from the relationship. We start to project and assume what others think.

Revealing is risky. We risk not being understood, an angry interaction and uncertainty.

It’s risking for the sake of closeness, better teamwork and our long-term happiness.

Revealing is a skill. Listening is a skill.

A book is a good place to start. Practice, commitment and recommitment get you there.

Here’s a collection of thoughts regarding the ‘definition of leadership’ that resonated.

I will add more as I find them.

“A leader is somebody who is taking radical responsibility for the influence they are having in the world. Don’t blame people, circumstance and experience.” — Jim Dethmer

A leader point to a destination. A new opportunity, a new way of doing things better.

Adam Grant generously contributed “languishing” to the cultural vocabulary. It’s the feeling of “Blah” or “Meh”. More on his TED talk and ideas to feel better. Hint: Look out for the 3Ms.

Having the right term to describe the right issue gets us moving in the right direction.

Thank you for the thought leadership, Adam.

Without pain, we won’t realize mistakes.

One day, our health will worsen. Our loved ones will die. We will make mistakes. We will fail.

When that happens, it’s painful.

1. We can deny (and avoid) the pain.
2. We can learn from it.

Once you understand the cause of pain and devise a way to work with, or through it, the quicker you can stand back on your feet. I observe this is true for me.

Journaling, therapy, or seeking out people who experience similar experiences to gain understanding.

The good news is the faster we learn from pain, the faster we can get through it.

Pain + reflections = progress.

And that might be the breakthrough that many can benefit from.