The other day, I went for coffee in a cafe. As I waited my turn, I chatted with the person in front and learned that she wanted water. Knowing where it was, I pointed her in the right direction. She was delighted and gave me a big cheer. The interaction was a best I’ve had all day. She was positive and she was open for connection.

Now, the server, who was getting paid to be there, was overworked and a little cranky. As she took my order, she mumbled thank you, implying that I wasn’t polite in the way I spoke to her.

But what she didn’t realise was that I had helped the person in front of me and I wasn’t intentional in the way I asked for a refill. She took away the goodwill that was accumulated by the many exceptional servers that came before.

The point is this. Work is personal. We bring our energy and our mana where we go. When we don’t know that, it’s easy to think that our day sucks and people are out to get us. Where in fact, we are part of making our day and how it turns out.

We get what we give. When the world stinks, for days in a row, maybe it’s us.

余裕 (yo yu), a Japanese term, means having a surplus, slack or extra capacity.

• Having spare time or room
• Being relaxed or composed
• Having financial surplus to spare
• Mental/emotional capacity to handle situations

In the world of cheaper, better and faster, it’s easy to slide down the path of efficiency. We don’t usually embrace yoyu, seeking easily measured productivity. Read more books, earn more money, have more friends.

When I spot a productive and happy person, I nod and I smile.

And I secretly hope that he’ll be my friend.

Thanks for pointing out, Seth.

One way is to learn from people who found it. Digest their books and interview.

Another way is to turn the phone off, travel, be alone and retreat.

Disconnect from the outside world and start a journey to the inside.

If you feel exhausted from the overwhelming flow of information, perhaps it’s because it’s meant to. To give you just enough and keep you addicted. It’s empty calories.

The hard part though… is to cut away from everything you know, and start the hero’s journey.

The journey that start with connecting to the inside.

Peers who look out for you.

Bank that cuts you a deal.

Van that transports your goods.

Suppliers that give you the good stuff.

Physicist at your back pocket.

Chef who understands your labour.

You could wait. You could whine.

Nina Parker didn’t.

She gathered regenerative farmers (like herself), chefs, volunteers and people who believed in her mission to eat better.

120 people paid and showed up.

An afternoon of conversations, panel discussion, market and beautiful food.

She found the like-minded… brought generosity and energy to places that don’t have enough of either. She gave first and she made magic.

No one told her what she should do. She took responsibility and gave away credit.

Alas, you can be Nina too. It’s free but not easy.

The life you always wanted is waiting for you on the other side.

I am waiting for you. We are, all, waiting for you.

Thank you, Nina. And all who added to the magic.

1Password makes remembering, typing and sharing passwords a delight.

Arc (free) is a different internet browser experience. Spaces, Split Windows and Command bar are a few things that I would miss if it were gone.

Bartender (US$16) organise my Mac menu bar into something useful and beautiful.

Beeper (free), brought over by the amazing folks at WordPress, combines WhatsApp, Slack, Facebook, Telegram, Instagram and LinkedIn into one app. Fast and delightful. I hope they bring back the send-later feature soon.

Fantastical is my Calendar app. It has not failed me.

Cardhop (made by Fantastical folks), gives me access to my contacts with a few buttons. I save baby names, dog names and cities of the people I love.

CleanShot (US$29) takes screenshots and videos, combined with Dropbox, makes it easy to report bugs and share design feedback.

Dropbox (US$17/m) protects my files and photos and makes it easy to share them. Pricier than iCloud or Google Drive, the security, support and delight are worth every penny.

I saved videos that inspired me with Downie (US$19). There’s something about keeping and organising that makes me remember.

DaisyDisk (US$10) finds out what’s eating up my disk space. Works on Dropbox and Google Drive too.

A new way to edit podcast interviews with text, Descript (US$12/m). It is at least 2x faster, but your milage may vary.

Fathom (free) records and transcribes Zoom and Google meetings. Free my attention from note-taking and focus on the person.

Flux (free) changes the screen colour to help with sleep.

iCloud, used in tandem with Dropbox, for extra storage. Mainly for photos and things I don’t need to access quick.

A nifty app, Maccy (US$10) keeps my “copy” history. Saves me from switching back and forth when copying text.

Magnet (US10) organise my screen, with shortcuts. Full screen, left, right, up, down.

Notion, replaced Apple Notes, Gdocs, Gsheets, Asana and Evernote. It took 2 years to move everything over, but I never looked back since. Marie Poulin has a great course.

Permute ($14.99), built by the same people as Downie, converts media files to different sizes and formats. Mostly to save precious disk space.

Perplexity, is replacing Google Search, and it has not asked me to pay yet.

Apple Photos (free), together with the iPhone and iCloud, feels like magic. With a bit of upfront work of tagging, finding photos of friends from 10 years ago, is a real treat.

Polymail ($10/m) is probably not the best email client. But it’s not painful enough yet to switch yet.

Rewind (free) records everything on my Mac screen. Peace of mind is worth the extra disk space.

Things (US$50) is my to-do list. I dump ideas, tasks, and articles and free up my mental space for more to come. Pairs with the GTD method.

As my work has become online, I have come to appreciate software. Tools that are made with attention and care.

Updated on 28th May 2025.

Could it be true that…

They are just busy?

Their loved one passed away?

They misread your intention?

Or simply that… they don’t like you?

Which interpretation serve you best?

And, hey… maybe it’s okay if they don’t like you?

Who would you be comfortable asking for a kidney when you need one?

It doesn’t mean that they would give you a kidney. But who would you be comfortable asking?

Think about it.

Now, who do you think would be comfortable asking you for a kidney?

You have friends, and you have a kidney friend.

Friendship is a choice. Don’t waste it on luck, bowling and a fair-weather friend.

It’s easy to think that trying hard, doing more, and people would like you.

The question, often forgotten is, “Do you need everyone to like you?”

Wanting to please everyone is a sure way to run out of gas for your work, and for the people that matters.

But what if, you can source approval from within, or from the people you truly respect?

Even the bible has one-star reviews. Who do we think we are?