Could it be true that…
They are just busy?
Their loved one passed away?
They misread your intention?
Or simply that… they don’t like you?
Which interpretation serve you best?
And, hey… maybe it’s okay if they don’t like you?
Who would you be comfortable asking for a kidney when you need one?
It doesn’t mean that they would give you a kidney. But who would you be comfortable asking?
Think about it.
Now, who do you think would be comfortable asking you for a kidney?
You have friends, and you have a kidney friend.
Friendship is a choice. Don’t waste it on luck, bowling and a fair-weather friend.
It’s easy to think that trying hard, doing more, and people would like you.
The question, often forgotten is, “Do you need everyone to like you?”
Wanting to please everyone is a sure way to run out of gas for your work, and for the people that matters.
But what if, you can source approval from within, or from the people you truly respect?
Even the bible has one-star reviews. Who do we think we are?
Shady people are smart. But smart people might not be shady.
Too often, there are looters in the system. Monopolising the market, increasing prices, ceasing innovation, in the end, the customer suffers.
Smart people might look shady working the system.
Crossing roads on green, taking the handicap seats.
But if there are no cars, or no one using the handicap seat, are they shady?
Between understanding the spirit of the rules and blindly following the rules, lies the difference between being smart and being shady.
What’s the point of a contract?
A stack of paper, with dense blocks of text, can be a great way to intimidate or cover your backside.
But, more often than not, a contract is an agreement for disagreement. A way to move forward in disagreements that sustains the interest of both parties.
When a disagreement occurs, and it always would, can you split the difference between a betrayal and a misunderstanding?
Why did you come together to do this thing? What are you trying to achieve? And what is the best outcome for each party?
Perhaps that is the spirit of the contract, before all the technical jargon.
Honest conversation, hash it out at the beginning, and put it in writing.
It’s entirely possible that things would turn out fine. It’s also possible to lose a lot of money, or worse, a dear dear friend.
Perhaps if you don’t have the time, maybe it’s not worth getting bed with that special someone.
Here’s the prequel.
I’ve found myself less enthusiastic about music. Podcasts have consumed most of my free time, and when I do listen to music, it’s often as background noise for dinner or gatherings.
In this experiment, I wanted to find out if deleting Spotify would rekindle my love of music.
Why: When asked for music recommendation, I realised that I couldn’t recall any songs or artists and don’t enjoy music as before.
Summary: Keep Spotify for podcast, and Shazam for identifying songs.
Mar 1 – I transferred old music from the computer to the phone, and swapped Spotify for Apple Music app location.
Mar 3 – Apple Music app navigation is a challenge when driving. But I started enjoying listening to my old music.
Mar 5 – I got used to the music app’s navigation, although the UI wasn’t as user-friendly as Spotify. I keep on enjoying my old music once again.
Mar 7 – I tried using Siri for music navigation, and it’s great.
Mar 8 – For new song, I saved screenshots of Shazam result and processed them later.
Mar 9 – I found the effort of discovering, selecting, and saving songs has a correlation to my music enjoyment. I decided to keep Spotify for podcasts. Apple Music for music playing.
Next experiment, I would try to replace Spotify podcast with Overcast.
I realized the other day, as I get older, life gets more interesting and complicated. Many opportunities, projects and situations come knocking on my door. At some point, it got overwhelming.
This all started after making enough to save. I decided that my work has to be more than saving and making money. I had ideas, not enough time and I didn’t know how to choose.
In the summer of 2018, I took time out to make sense of things in Hualien. I wrote a list of what I had learned and cared about.
The Life and Lessons of Bryan
I live honestly without contradictions
to fool no one, and myself
to find the nuance, from an assumption,
an aphorism, to a fact of life.
To see reality as it is
and always be a fool to the truth.
I redefine possibilities.
First for myself, then for the world.
Because I’m a little crazy.
Because “good enough”, isn’t.
Because what I do says who I am.
I see the good.
From the person beside me,
to what has happened to me.
In changing my perspective,
I give others a new story.
I play long-term games,
because the best returns in life
comes from compounded interest.
In love, in relationships, in wealth, in health.
I find courage,
to admit my flaws,
to share my truth,
to act from love,
to do the right things when no one is looking,
to do it all over again tomorrow.
To live my life with fun, brilliance, agency, spaciousness, and above all, integrity.
[Last updated on 22 Jul 2025]
What a privilege for each of us to think about what makes a life worth living.
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