And doctors fall into this trap all the time. Their bais to extend life. Because after all, that’s what they are taught.
The other day when I volunteered at the hospice. A patient expressed how they have accepted death. Instead of chemotherapy, he is enjoying his last days. He is ready and this is how he want to die.
The expression is met with sadness from a nurse. In her mind, he should be more positive, more wanting to live.
But could it be that it’s entirely possible that he is happy?
The same goes for the advice-giver (I have been guilty of this). As much as you think it might be helpful, most people don’t want your advice.
The simple trick is enrolment, the prove of willingness. To ask “Would it be useful to brainstorm some ideas on this or maybe if you would prefer a hug instead?”